It was pretty bizarre; this afternoon I took some time to read through my old blog posts. Not all of them, but a fair amount. I don’t read through what I’ve written after it’s posted; it’s not really on my radar to do.
But I did today.
Now I feel a bit wistful, or something, because reading those old posts I could remember what was happening the day I wrote it. My blog isn’t quite a diary, but each post contained something unique to that day.
Some of the posts are short, small snippets about the weather that day, or the beauty of a moment. Chai, overalls, winter. God, lists, plants. Every blog post was part of my year. Every blog post is surrounded by unwritten context, thoughts, emotions, people. In every blog post lies hundreds of untold stories. And on the internet, I timidly handed over a small aspect of each day, making up my 2017.
I’m glad I read over some of my old work (I say, as though I’m a professional who’s been writing for fifty years) because I think everyone should appreciate what they do sometimes. Not in a boastful way, but to simply look at something you’ve created and think “yes, I did that.” I did that. This blog is my very own. And I mean, God gives us gifts and it’s through Him that I can write, but it’s something of mine that I can be proud of.
I have to share this, because it cracked me up. It’s from a blog post I wrote last year.
“Knowing that the year (2017) only has two months left and knowing that I’ll be moving in a month and a half is a mix between freedom and grief. I wish there were a word for this. Maybe freif? Maybe griedom. I’ll work on this.”
I laughed, at least. A lot. Probably more than I should’ve.
See, I had completely forgotten I had written that. And to look back and read that and laugh is messing with my mind a little bit. Go Sarah though.
One of the other blog posts I wrote in December last year mentioned that I had written 15,000 words of my novel. Today, I have 44,000. Retrospect can be such a downer, but in moments like this, to look back just shows you how far you’ve come, how much you’ve done, how much you’ve grown and learnt.
Moral of the story: blogging has done so much for me.
(Also, get excited for a special blog post about sunflowers tomorrow, campers. I know I am!)
Sarah xx
the softest words 