Awake (written by Sarah Bennett)
I fell asleep at eighteen and opened my eyes at twenty five. I tell myself I’m wiser from it all, but I don’t know if that’s true. I threw away time I thought I didn’t need and now spend every second trying to keep up with the present.
I do the things that should help. Set my alarm, leave for work on time. I turn the heat all the way up in the car and ask myself why I can’t stop going over the dream. I try to see the drive as a metaphor but all I see is the traffic.
People tell me it was a nightmare and they tell me it was mine. They forget I don’t know how to live without my eyes closed. They are all tired of my exhaustion and say I should be angry instead, but how can I be angry at the things I put up with for love?
I wonder if they realise no one has ever known me quite like you.
A little poem I wrote this week. I like the thought of posting my little creative bursts in the middle of the week, then have a sit down and write a longer post on the weekends. I don’t want to lock myself into anything if it won’t last, but lately writing has been fairly easy. I feel motivated, and like I have things to say. I’ve been working on a novel and I don’t know where it will go, but so far I’ve loved writing down short chapters here and there that maybe one day I can pull together to create a story. It’s exciting stuff! Maybe even more exciting since I get to track it in my Bullet Journal…