Looking Around

I don’t know when life began to look like this.

I’ve been tying to say yes to a lot of things. I’m learning to accept a bit of awkwardness for the possibility of something good. I’m learning to do things on my own.

And I like it, mostly.

I like growing in independence and seeing how I’m more capable of things than I used to be. Or, less afraid of them. I love driving now, which I used to get nervous about when going somewhere I hadn’t been before. And okay, I mostly like it because I have great taste in music and I enjoy having ten or fifteen minutes when I can just relax and sing along and forget I have other responsibilities. It’s a good time.

I’ve met people who I wouldn’t have if I didn’t say yes, and I’m getting to know them which I wouldn’t if I said no to future invites. I’m trying to connect further and deeper and get past the surface level acquaintance.

If I truly believe God brought me where I am today, then I also need to trust in the people He brings into my life and the opportunities He’s handing me. I don’t want to say no, I don’t want to ignore the good things He has for me and for the people around me.

I like being on my own, mostly. I like experiencing life with myself and growing comfortable being by myself. I like looking back and seeing how I’ve grown, I like supporting myself. But I say mostly because sometimes it would be nice to share those moments with someone else. (Okay, I didn’t mean for this post to become about being single.)

My point is, I didn’t choose everything that’s happened to me. But in what I can choose, I’m trying my best.

Sarah xx

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