I wake up and journal, eat breakfast and get ready for the day. I drive to work with good music playing and navigate through the fog, brace myself to face the cold for twenty seconds while I walk into the office. I work and drink tea and stand by the heater, but mostly work. I drive back home, the fog gone, and my slippers are waiting. I make another cup of tea but this time I’m wearing a hoodie and I can read a chapter of a book without looking at the clock.
I repeat, and repeat, and repeat, go to church.
In some ways, I’m living the most ordinary life. I work and I go to church and tell myself I should bake something soon. Some people may call this boring. I call this enjoyable. I’ve found the ease to my weeks; waking up early is normal once more and each day I go about what needs to be done. I enjoy the lazier Saturday’s yet am thankful that my body clock gets me out of bed earlier than nine. Not because there’s anything to do as such, but because there’s more time to relax in a tasteful manner.
I enjoy waking up, and enjoy what I do throughout the day. I find contentment in the routine, in the every day, and find the rhythm comfortable.
It’s not that I ‘need’ a plan, or schedule, or list to feel content (though in a different context perhaps that would be accurate). It’s more that I’m enjoying just living the every day. I’m not doing anything exciting, yet I look forward to my day, every day. After five months of having wobbly time, it feels so pleasant to have hours of certain jobs, to wake up with places to go, even if it’s the same few places over and over.
The every day routine. The small things we repeat.
I’m writing more now that I have a job. I’m spending my time outside of work more wisely, and with things that energise me rather than things that I do out of boredom. Instead of spending a lot of time scrolling through social media I’m journalling and reading Christian books and playing Sims – does playing Sims count – and blogging. My novel remains untouched, but in July I’m yet again succumbing to the writing competition in which I’m challenged to write a certain amount of words a day. We’ll cross that bridge when we see the dawn of July.
With the exception of the days when I have to clean the bathroom – why do they come around so often – my days are lovely.
Last night I was energised and sorted through a lot of old papers. You know the ones; letters from the bank, receipts, study notes, birthday cards. I ended up recycling a lot (mum be proud I remembered to recycle), and though I did this at nine at night, which is unusual and late for a morning person, I was energised because I had been productive during the day. It wasn’t tiring or painful, it was almost, and this is a bit embarrassing, fun. It felt natural to do.
On the flip side, this week I bought two new books. I’ve been enjoying reading again (I missed you) and it feels even more special to do so, like a treat-yo-self for working.
I do believe I needed the first few months of this year to rest and enjoy what God has given me, just as I believe this job has come at the right time. Different seasons of our lives have different priorities; some seasons may require more work while others may be all about resting and taking time off. Right now I’m not working full time, which I will probably be doing at some point in my life, whilst a few months ago I wasn’t working at all.
Now I’m going to go and read a few chapters of my new book before I go to sleep by 10:30. Marvellous.
Sarah xx
the softest words 