The Art of Weeping

There are some things in life that make you unexpectedly weepy. (I always liked that word. Weepy.) (I want to type it again. Weepy.)

Just quietly, I’ve been binge watching “Call the Midwife” all day. I’m not exaggerating, either. I watched from 7:30 in the morning until 6 at night.

I cried many times during the day watching the series.

I’m not particularly into babies like others, though I have become fond of them over the last couple of years. So here I am, crying over all of these babies.

There was this woman who was in her forties and she didn’t know she was pregnant. She had lost a child earlier in her life and had lost hope of conceiving again. Then boom, she was having a little girl and I couldn’t stop crying. I have no idea why.

There was a man who died in hospital seconds after seeing his newborn child. Again, couldn’t stop crying.

So all in all, I think it was a good day.

In all seriousness, in moments like that I’ve begun to ask myself what about it made me cry. Because it’s clearly hitting something in you. I mean, sure there are some things that are generally upsetting that most people cry about (such as watching Titanic) but then there are other things that may only be affecting you, particularly based on your past experiences.

I’ve started writing everything that upsets me down, just to understand myself better, then I can pray about it. I’ve actually really enjoyed doing this so far, because it’s a deeper way of journaling and it just adds something more to uncovering my own heart.

I don’t know. This post was just supposed to be about Call the Midwife, not deep teary stuff. But I suppose that’s a part of life. Sometimes things leak out when we don’t expect it, because it’s what we need.

Sarah xx

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