The expectations were great when the plan to have a “Super Happy Fun Day” was made. (We titled our day that and everything; it was official from the get-go.) There was so much of a lead up; I knew it was coming for a number of weeks, and I was ready. I was born ready.
Until I fell at the last hurdle; not feeling super, happy, or fun on the morning of the “Super Happy Fun Day” (or the mornings before that, but we don’t go there in this blog post).
This leaves three options: 1) pretend to be happy, 2) not go and make up a lame excuse, or 3) have your day as planned but be honest about how you feel.
The three of us having the SHFD (I’m really glad that acronym wasn’t dodgy) (because it totally could’ve been) decided on option three, and started out on the adventure. And because I love breakfast and adventurers need breakfast, our first ‘adventure’ was to eat breakfast. We listened to good music on the way which made up for the lack of enthusiasm. Because, somewhere between greeting the day and having breakfast our SHFD turned into a “Super Honest Feelings Adventure”.
Breakfast was had, and more plans made. Things were picking up, because breakfast makes you feel better and so does having an honest conversation or two. I was still doubtful that the “Happy” part of the day would be found, but we’ll get to that soon. At least we met our quota on the “Super Honest Feelings Adventure” aspect.
We settled ourselves at a lookout with a view of beach and greenery and paragliders, which at least helped the “Super” part of the day.
Beach had to happen after this, because beach is one of my favourite things, and I thought that would aid the “Happy”.
It did.
The sand was a perfect texture (those there know what I’m talkin’ about) and the waves were the “Happy”. Altogether, the beach was pretty perfect.
I’m going to stop us here and tell you this: the company was wonderful. Please don’t assume that just because the day wasn’t happy until about four in the afternoon that anyone was doing something wrong. I’m more grateful that we could all hang out without the pressure of wearing a mask and pretending we were okay. That’s what I appreciate in a friend. When you’re allowed to feel what you’re actually feeling.
And even though I wasn’t really happy until late afternoon, it was a good day. And I enjoyed the whole day, and I enjoyed it more because of the freedom to be real. And then when we were happy, it was because we were feeling genuinely happy. And you can be genuinely happy without totally dismissing what was making you feel flat.
It’s enjoying how pretty the sky looks when the sun is setting. Even though it seems like your whole world is unraveling, it’s letting yourself feel contented by the joys that pop up along the way. I was able to appreciate the beach and the sky even though other stuff is going on. And it’s not pretending and it’s not pushing down what you feel, it’s living life as honest as you can.
So we were at the beach and it was wonderful and then we ate more food and listened to more good music, and along the way it actually turned into a “Super Happy Fun Day”.
My encouragement is this: have your own version of a “Super Happy Fun Day”, even if you don’t feel super, happy, or fun. Give yourself a chance to feel, and then give yourself a chance to smile. That sounds awfully cheesy, and not something I would probably say out loud, so don’t make me, and don’t quote me on that. But I suppose right now, in this moment, it’s what I believe.
Campers, it’s okay to have a bad day, just let yourself have a good day, too,
Sarah xx
the softest words 